Ultra Legend of Red
by REDMASTEROFPOKEMON
Summary: Red, Brendan and Smogon find themselves stranded in a parallel universe, where things are not quite right. Will they survive in this perilous new world, and is there a way for them to find their way home?
1. Chapter 1

**chapter 1 a gay new world**

after the final battel between red and his team of real fans of the original 151 and the evil cyberbully smogon it was finally over.

the cyberbilly apeared 2 b dead but sadly so was red and his bro brendan. the story of that world is over 4 now tho. this story takes place in another place.

smogon waked up in what apeared 2 b viridian forest.

"wtf didnt i die?" smogon sayed

"no" sayed red.

"wtf didn't U die?!" smogon sayed.

"yes" sayed brendan.

"no i didn't shut up ret*rd" sayed red. "after u banned us we ended up in this place insted. it seems 2 b like the real kanto xcept it is some other world."

"how do u know its not just normal kanto?" smogon sayed.

"magic" sayed red.

"ok" smogon agreed. "anyway now we got that boring shit out of the way i am goin 2 ban u stupid kids again. time 2 fight red.

"more like time 2 lose u fucking nerd" red sayed back. "go charizard!"

"i ban all charizards!" smogon sayed.

but nothing happened.

"umm... i ban flamethrower charizard" smogon sayed.

"charizard use flamethrower!" red sayed.

"oh no" smogon sayed as he got burned to fuck by the flaemthrower. "wtf why can't i ban things anymore?"

"idk lol" red sayed.

just then a bug catcher popped out of a tree with an explamation mark apears above his head.

"our eyes locked we have 2 fight" he tells red.

"time 2 get owned u mean" red sayed smugly. "go charizard!"

"ha charizard!" laffed the bug catcher. "that is bottom tier trash. go galvantula!"

"more like GAYvantula!" laffed brendan. "go on bro destroy that fake"

"yes" said red. "a fake pokemon will always lose in one hit to one of the original 151. use flamethrower."

"outspeed him and use thunderbolt" the bug catcher said.

and then something horrible happened. the fake spider abomination was faster than charizard and killed him in 1 hit.

"i win" the bug catcher cheered. "give me ur money nerds."

"how did this happen...?" red gasped as he taked out his wallet.

"charizard is a low tier shitmon" the bug catcher sayed.

"no it's not. die u little asshole" said brendan. then he taked out his mall cop nightstick and beat the bug catcher 2 death with it.

"lol" laffed red and smogon.

"he is actually right though" sayed smogon with a worried look. "i'm looking at my site now. charizard is in the nu tier. that spider shit he was using is ou."

"WTF?!" red and brendan explaimed.

"but thats not all" smogon sayed ominiouously. "the month on my phone says it is 2010"

"OH NO" red and brendan explaimed even louder.

"2010 is a really bad year" red sayed. "it is the year that the shit games black and white came out. it is when nintendo added the worst pokemon of all the unovabominations. not only that but this is some weird world where the original 151 arent the only pokemon people like. we need 2 get out of this fuckin world now."

"yes" said brendan and smogon.

but will they? find out next time on ultra legend of red.


	2. Chapter 2

**chapter 2 rr**

red and brendan and smogon walked out of viridian forest which was next to viridian city where viriian gym was.

"lets go to viridian gym" expositioned red.

"yes" said brendan.

suddenly before they could make it out of viridian forest into viridian city a wormhole opened infront of them! out of the wormhole stepped a chinese businessman in a suit.

"no... it can't be... junichi masuda?!" said red (that is the creator of pokemon for any uneducated fake fan reading this)

"i remember you. you were the one who gived me my mew."

"no that was santa" smogon reminded him.

"oh yeah lol. i actualy don't know this guy."

"your wrong anyway goy" masuda interupted. "i am not junichi masuda. im JEWnichi masuda the owner of jewtendo! i have come here 2 invite the legendary villains smogon and brendan 2 join my evil team "rr"."

"what does "rr" stand for?" asked red.

"like i'd tell u" laffed masuda. "what kind of dumb idiot villain would just tell the hero there evil plan and make it easyer 2 foil?"

"all the villains in ur games?" laffed red.

"fuck off!" laffed masuda. "anyway will u 2 join me?"

"no" sayed brendan. "i will not abandon my bro red this time."

"yes lol fuck these 2 cucks" sayed smogoon.

"good" sayed masuda as he rubbed his hands together. "come through the wormhole with me to the rr headquarters."

"should we just follow them in and stop them?" suggested brendan.

"good idea lol" sayed red.

"wtf u can't do that" complained jewnichi. "shofu stop them!"

suddenly a very black man emerged out of the wormhole 2 stand in our heroes way.

"oh no its shofu the sworn enemie of verlisify!" red explaimed.

"yo dats right u furfoolz! my boy masuda called me here 2 rep the rr gang."

"what the fuck is he saying?" asked berndan.

"thats his pokebonics" explaned red. "hopefuly it doesnt get offensive enough 4 our story 2 get taken down."

"those mods be some weakass haters if they do dawg" shofu sayed. "anyway u bitches want 2 go thru dat wormhole u gotta go thru me 1st."

"ok" sayed red.

and then they got ready 2 battel.


	3. Chapter 3

dedicatin this next chapter too Revamped Persona my new fan

 **chapter 3 shofu**

red and shofu sented out there first pokemon. red of course used charizard a real mans pokemon. shofu the fake fan used a scrafty instead.

"charizard?" laffed shofu. "haha dis white boy a stupid ni..."

"stop u fuckin ret*rd!" interupted brendan. "u cant say the n word in this story. its rated pg."

"u tryna shut down my pokebonics?! das not happenin u wack ass bitches. scrafty use fake out on dat fatass dragon!"

scrafty went to attack reds charizard but he anticipatid the attack and blocked it with protect.

"what the fuck how did u know i was gonna do that?!" shofu explained.

"that is simple" red ansered. "u r nothing but a smogon drone who uses cookie cutter sets. verlis showed me how to deal with ppl like u."

"fuck not only does dat furbitch have more video views then me but hes better at pokemon then me to" sayed shofu angrily.

"why dont u just inovate?" red asked.

"innovate dis u bitch!" shofu replied. "scrafty use knock off on that gay ass charizard!"

"charizard mega evolve!" red comanded. but nothing happened. "oh shit its 2010 they didnt invent mega chairzard yet!"

"haha das right!" shofu jeered.

"but if they didnt invent mega charizard yet then knockoff is still shit and does like 2 damage" red realised.

"aww hell naw!" shofu cried as his scrafty did next to no damage 2 charizard.

"now finish it with fire blast!" ordered red witch his charizard did.

meanwhile smogon was being leaded into a control room by masuda where many other villains were sitting around watching red fite agenst shofu on a computer screen.

"heh i would not make such an amateur mistake" sneered wolfe glick the vgc cheater.

"oh yeah well if your so good why did u lose in vgc17 after verlis exposed ur cheating the year before?" laffed kevin robinson the asshole kid from my skool.

"kaphotics my raichu please" retorted wolfe as he turned to a fat hacker loser.

kaphotics typed a bunch of keys on a computer which pokegenned a hacked raichu for wolfe.

"thanks" smirked wolfe. "raichu use thunderbolt on that loser kevin robinson and make it intense enough to kill him slowly"

raichu then shocked kevin for 20 minutes until he finally died.

"who invited that fucking asshole anyway?" asked giovanni.

"oh i did my bad" said masuda. "i found him on red's list of top 10 most hated people. i didnt realise what a fat gay baby he was."

"anyway..." sayed giovanni. "what is ur plan? all i see in this room is a bunch of people that red and his pathetic friends have already beaten. how is bringing us together going to do anything?"

"and just what is "rr" anyway?" smogon added.

"goys listen!" masuda tried to shout though raising his voice set off his alergies and he had to take out a inhaler.

after a 3 minute coughing fit masuda finally continued.

"i created this group "rr" to do what we here at jewtendo have always done. rehash! 14 years ago we made a great game called pokemon red and it had 151 great pokemon in it and it had the best region of all time aka kanto. i soon realised i could make a lot of money by selling great games like this. but then i relised my fans r idiots and will buy anything called "pokemon". so we just rehash pokemon red every year but with shitty new pokemon and regions. red is a problem though. he is telling everyone about the superiorness of the original 151 and i am worried he might raise there standards. this group, the rehash republic was created 2 stop red"


	4. Chapter 4

**chapter 4 the return of n(azi)**

after they beated shofu red and brendan tryed to go threw the wormhole but it was already closed by rr. shofu got traped on the other side of the wormhole with them

"shofu tell me about rr" sayed red.

"hell 2 da naw my n-wordz" sayed shofu in his pokebonics.

"look those loosers left u 4 dead" exclaimed brendan. "u should just help us find them so we can beat them and go back home."

"das true my white haired whiteboy" shofu replys. "ok i tell u what i know tho it aint much. rr is full of these pissed off lil white boys who work fo dat chinaman jewnichi. i dont know where dey hiding out but its in some big castle. they warped me in there with a wormhole from wen i was filming 1 of my youtube vidz fo my 7 subscribers. im so fucking jealous of all dat verlisifys million subz man."

"a castle" red repeted. "and its full of nerds who hate me?

"das right" shofu sayed.

"r u thinking what im thinking?" red asked brendan.

"they r at the renaissance fair?"

"no lol u r*tard they r at fuckin unova. remember when we beat that emo kid n and he cut himself to death lol?"

"oh yeah lol that was fucking hilarius. anyway we need 2 go to unova and find n(azi). he is probly helping rr."

and they did.

unfortunatly when they arrived at unova the two heros were met by a horibel site. unova was now the most powerful region in the world and it was run by its dictator n(azi) the king of team plasma.

"fuck i forgot its 2010" sayed red.

"how is that emo kid still alive?" brendan sayed.

"i just fuckin said u idiot" red ansered. "anyway this is another dimension were we never saved the world from the fake pokemon. he would not be dead hear anyway."

just then a giant tv screen on the side of a tv at castelia city (gay city from black and white. i only know its name from the wiki lol dont play those stuped games) turned on and n greeted the people.

"greetings fellow virgins" sayed n. "today is the 1 month aniversary of pokemon battles being outlawed and replaced by talking and crying insted. i hope u will all join me in listening to my new fanfic i wrote. this one is a 100 million word sex novel about me and my gardevour waifu. any1 who doesnt lissen will be executed to death by having there wrists cut."

"fuck we betta hide" sayed brendan as n(azi)s secret police came to make sure every1 was lissening.


	5. Chapter 5

**chapter 5 the black rainbow of gayness**

n(azi)'s police officers searched unova looking 4 ppl who r not lissening to n's disgusting fanfic. they had no pokemon sinse n banned them and insted just carryed knives to slit the wrists of any1 that went agenst n.

"wait brendan i have an idea" sayed red. "these loosers dont not have pokemon so we can just use our charizards to get through them. they cant slit our wrists if we just fly above them."

"oh yeah lol" laffed brendan.

they got on there charizards and flew 2 high 4 the police to reach and burned them all with flamethrower as they flyed to n(azi)'s castle.

meanwhile a wormhole was opening in n's castle and out of it stepped none other then jewnichi masuda. the chinese business man looked very angry as he walked up 2 the emo kid.

"what r u doing here?" n(azi) sayed. "i hate socialising. i also hate the sunshine and ur wormhole is glowing and reminding me of the sun and that really hurts my feelings."

"grrr listen goy we have to have some serius talks ok?" sayed masuda. "look at these sales figures!"

masuda taked out a list of how many copys of black and white had been selled. there was much less than all the other pokemon games especially red and blue which selled over twice as many.

"that is just because these fuckin normies dont have the taste to apreciate my game's story" moped n. "they dont understand what really matters. people dont play games for the gameplay. they play 4 the story. unless they r stupid idiot normie babys who have no culture."

after he had finished talking n vaped an e-cig and then put his headphones in so he could listen to linkin park insted of masuda. this made masuda angry and he smacked the e-cig out of his mouth and pulled out the headphones.

"oy no U listen u mopey schmuck! u r hurting our profit. i know our fans r idiots but these sales proove that even most pokemon fans have high enough standards 2 not buy black and white. this is what we are going 2 do. theres going to be a game called black and white 2..."

"what?!" gasped n. "but that is so lazy! not even coming up with a new name and just putting a number on..."

"thats right! and to make even more money were goin to release 2 different games insted of 1!"

n gasped in horror as masuda continued.

"and so people actuly buy it this time were goin 2 put all the real pokemon back in like charizard and pikachu not just these stupid new abominations we maid up for ur game!"

"no anything but that!" begged n(azi). "please give me 1 more chance mr masuda! i will join rr like u wanted! il even stop red myself!"

"alright fine" agreed masuda. "but u know i dont trust u 2 get it done on ur own. red and verlisfy already beat u in another dimension. so i will b sending 1 of my rr members 2 join u. but dont u worry n. i think the 2 of u r goin 2 get along just fine."

all of an sudden a edgy nerd in a black trenchcoat and fedora with a stupid weeb sword steped out of the portal.

"this is austin lexibug" sayed masuda. "we found him on red's list of top 10 worst enemys. apparently he is a gay emo looser just like u."

"in another dimension we were gay boyfriends" sayed austin. "i hope 1 day we can b the same way."

"i have high standards 4 who i want 2 lose my virginity 2" replyed n(azi). "though i find ur fedora very hot. u r clearly a man of culture aswell."

"if we work together we can beat brendan and red" sayed austin. "i hate them so much. they remind me of the bullys at my school who used 2 make fun of me for being a furry and a emo."

"your a furry 2?!" gasped n.

"yes and a stupid looser with shit taste" austin added. "i bet whoever made me is a big fucking virgin who faps 2 gardevoir porn."

just then red and brendan arrived at n's castle and masuda left.


	6. Chapter 6

**chapter 6 the battel for unova**

red and brendan braked into team plasmas castle by making there charizards knock down the doors. sum team palsma grunts tried 2 stop them but they had no pokemon and was easily beated by the charizards.

"ok brendan we mite have 2 fite all of rr when we get 2 the top of this castle" red sayed. "please tell me u have a real team this time and that charizard is not goin 2 b ur only good pokemon."

"dont worry my teams the best" brendan grinned. "i didnt do anything dumb like have all the pokemon the same type again 2 try and be like a gym leader."

"oh good" sayed red with a sigh of relief.

"yeah this time i copyed lance's team from the end of pokemon crystal. he was the final boss and dont worry i checked and he only had real pokemon on his team so he must be really strong."

"oh fuck" facepalmed red as they continued on there way 2 the top.

luckly 4 them rr was not waiting and only n(azi) and the gay looser austin lexibug. they were cutting there wrists while listening 2 music through headphones on there own like antisocial fucks.

"let the bodys hit the floor! let the bodys hit the floor!" sang n.

"craaaaawwwling in my skiiiiiiinn!" sang austin.

"gay" sayed red and brendan at the same time.

n and austin looked up and seeed that there enemys had arived.

"red at last i will have my revengence" smirked austin as he lowered his fedora so that the shadow covered his eyes.

"who the fuck r u again lol?" asked red.

"u dont remember?" growled austin. "all the pain and misery u caused me when we were in high school and U DONT REMEMBER?!."

"what did i do?" asked red.

"u maid up that mean name for me "asstin lexibitch" and all the other kids called me it and hurt my feelings!"

"lol" sayed red and brendan.

"then 2 make it even worse u had sex with every girl in our school xcept the ugly fat bitches wile i was still a virgin until i was 21!"

both red and brendan laffed uncontrollably at this witch hurt austins feelings even more.

"THEN! if that wasnt fucking bad enough i found out that when my umbreon was having sex with me SHE WAS THINKING ABOUT YOU!"

"wow gay" sayed brendan.

"yeah lol" sayed red. "anyway lets multi battel these nerds"

"only 1 pokemon each or it will go on for too long and be boring as fuck" brendan added.

"ok" sayed the two emos as they sented out there pokemon.

red and brendan choosed charizard and dragonite while austin and n(azi) choosed charizard and zoroark.


	7. Chapter 7

**chapter 7**

"im surprised a emo like u actualy has good enough taste 2 use a charizard" red sayed as he saw austin's pokemon.

"if u think thats impressing u've seen nothing yet. drakaiser mega evolve!"

"lol this kid thinks he can mega evolve in 2010" laffed brendan.

"he nicknames his pokemon as well" added red. "what a gay"

"shut up u assholes!"cried austin. "for ur information i can mega evolve my charizard because masuda let me!"

"oh because he knew u would lose otherwise" laffed red.

"FUCK OFF!"

really angry now the emo kid swung his katana which had the mega stone inside it and turned his charizard into a mega charizard x only it had black flames and a neckbeard.

"this is mega charizard z a dark/dragon type mega evolve of charizard!" he boasted. "and its goin 2 kill all of ur precius charizards 1 by 1"

"wrong" said red. "even in this world where the fake pokemon r not all weak the power of inovation is still stronger then anything. i will beat your edgy fake charizard with just this one charizard. no mega evolution."

"i will deal with brendan so u can have ur revenge on this asshole" n told austin. "zoroark use night daze."

the gay fox furry attacked brendans dragonite but luckily the move missed.

"lol" laffed brendan. "dragonite use twister!"

"twister?!" explaimed n. "what kind of idiot uses that teribel move?"

"twister is a fuckin great move" brendan replyed. "is lance, aka the final boss in pokemon crystal a idiot with teribel moves? yeah thats what i fuckin thought"

n sighed as the dragonite used twister and taked off some of his zoroark's health.

meanwhile austins edgy looser charizard and reds cool normal charizard were about to attack.

"drakaiser use dark flare blast!" sayed austin.

"charizard use sunny day" sayed red. "also what the fuck is that bullshit move u just maid up?"

the edgy neckbeard charizard attacked first and took off a lot of health with the maid up move. reds charizard set up the sun afta that.

"its a stronger fire blast that also gives u a fake status thing i maid up called evil burn" austin explained. "but sinse ur stupid charizard is still a fire type i cant burn it"

"thanks 4 telling me wot type ur bad maid up mega pokemon is" mocked red. "now i know how 2 beat it in 1 hit"

"yeah right like thats going to happen" austin moped. "my charizard went 1st so its faster then urs."

"good" grinned red. "i was counting on that."

meanwhile n and brendan continued there fight.

"zoroark use night daze again!" comanded n(azi)

"lol i bet it will miss again" mocked brendan.

and it did.

"ok now dragonite use thunder!" instructed brendan.

"haha thunder has a horrible hit rate that will definitely miss" n laffed.

however the thunder not only hit but it also paralysed n's zoroark.

"FFFUUUUCCK!" screamed n throwing a tarantula like a little baby.

"lol get owned" sayed brendan. "now i will finish off ur stuped fox with the best move, twister!"

"no u wont because zoroark is faster and its going to get crit night daze and confuse u 2 death!" sayed n despratly.

unfortunatly 4 the emo kid the paralyse made zoroark slower then dragonite and dragonite went 1st and killed it with twister.

"nice now i can help red beat the other looser" sayed brendan.

"leave it" red insisted. "i have already winned."

"no u dumb idiot" insulted austin. "drakaiser end his pathetic normie charizard with a dark flare blast.

once again the edgy neckbeard charizard went 1st and this time its attack did more damage because of the sun. it almost killed reds charizard but apparently this was what red had planed since his charizard took out a petaya berry 2 increase its special attack. the sun also made it even stronger sinse it had solar power.

"now my charizards special attack is high enough 2 kill u in 1 hit. charizard use focus blast!"

reds charizard used the focus blast to beat the fake dark type charizard and killed it in 1 hit. even with a made up mega evolution the emo kid was no match for red's petaya berry inovation.


	8. Chapter 8

**chapter 9 dimensions colide**

after red and brendan defeted the two emos n began to cry and austin taked out of his katana

"u assholes r goin 2 pay" the edgy fuck said as he lowered his fedora so the shadow covered his eyes. "ur pokemon cant attack humans because there not shadow pokemon like mine so theres nothing stoping me from spilling ur blood now."

"wrong" laffed brendan. "dragonite twister this gaylord lol"

and it did. the tornado knocked austin over and he scraped his knees and began crying 2. red and brendan both laffed at this super hard. however there laffing would be shortlived after what comed next.

suddenly a wormhole opened up and a sports car came driving out and ran charizard and dragonite over. the car pulled up and outstepped a giant douchebag in sunglasses with a bluetooth headset and a t-shirt that said "winners hack, breeders go home". red imediately recognised him.

"ray rizzo"

"lol ray rizzo?" laffed brendan. "i remember him. hes a washed up vgc champion. u beat him easily remember?"

"no that was ray rizzo in 2016" red sayed with a ominius expresion. "this is ray rizzo in 2010. he is the vgc champion right now"

"yeah thats right u fucking chumps" sneered ray as he rolled up a stack of money, lit it on fire, and smoked it in there faces. "im the fuckin best e-athlete on the pokemon world and your nothing but two little nobodys."

ray then taked out a needle full of steroids and injected it into his dick.

"OH YEAH I LOVE CHEATING SO FUCKING MUCH!" he cryed after receiving a testostrone boost. "FIGHT ME YOU LITTLE FAAAAAGGGGS! HIT ME WITH THAT POKEGEN KAPHOTICS!"

in the pasenger seet of the sports car was kaphotics the hacker nerd. he taked out his laptop and hit some keys witch made dream balls appear in rays hands.

"what is pokegen?" sayed brendan.

"it is fuckin cheats" sayed red. "its like what they had instead of pkhex in 2010. we are super dead bro. i didnt expect cheating and didn't inovate hard enough."

"YEAH THATS RIGHT CHEATING IS MY LIIIIIIFE!" roared ray as he taked out his phone to order steroids and hookers for later that night.

"this is like wolfe glick all over again" sighed brendan. "and we only beat him because we had verlisify on our side."

"u called?"

suddenly another wormhole opened up and out came a magnificent hero in a pokewalker dog collar riding on a mighty arcanine. holding onto his back was a girl in a stupid white hat.

"verlis and lillie!" gasped red. "just in time!"

"my cheater senses were tingling" sayed verlis. "even in another dimension pokemon cheaters cant hide from me. i decided 2 find lillie and bring her hear 2 help 2."

"YOU THINK YOU CAN STOP ME NEEEEERRRDD!" growled ray. "ILL BEAT YOU 2!"

"wait stop" urged kaphotics. "this is verlis my greatest enemy. every time i try 2 hack he exposes me and runes it. i did not expect him. the 6 arceuses i hacked u mite not b enough 4 him."

"U CAN CHEAT EVEN MORE?!" screamed ray in delite. "I WILL WAIT FOR THAT. THE THOUGHT OF CHEATING EVEN HARDER THAN THIS GETS MY DICK. SO. HARD!"

the 2 of them then retreated into the wormhole along with austin and n.

red and brendan had taken over n's castle and reunited with verlis and lillie but aparently they were no closer 2 finding rr.


	9. Chapter 9

**chapter 10 the tornament**

after beating n and his gay boyfriend red and his friends desided 2 figure out how to find out where rr's base was.

"they werent in unovaids after all" red said. "so now how do we find them?"

"thats simple" lillie explained. "unova was the beginning of 'the great laziness'. a time when jewtendo stopped putting actual level design and puzzles into there games and just made them into a bunch of coridors with fights and cutscenes. i should know i lived in one of these shitty game worlds all my life.

"oh yeah lol" red laffed. "fine then we will just follow the only corridor out of this gay castle and we should find them."

meanwhile in the rr castle jewnichi and his gang of bad men were watching them on a gold plated tv.

"how did u afford such a shiny tv then jewnichi?" giovanni asked.

"oh thats simple goy" (((he))) laffed. "if you want to have nice things in life you just have to cut corners on costs when it comes to the things that dont matter! and in my case thats the qualify of my games!"

he let out a very jewish laff as he began jerking himself off with a stack of rolled $100 notes.

"red seems to have figured out the secret of your game world" smogon warned. "he knows he can get to us by just walking in a straight line. i managed 2 beat him before. after all thats the reason hes here. but i had more powers back then. i could ban anything i wanted. jewnichi since ur the pokegod i gess you can grant any powers u want so long as its related to ur games. give me the powers i used 2 have and i will beat red for u."

"sorry goy but giving just isnt in my nature" jewnichi shuddered. "whenever i do anything generous my asthma starts playing up. in fact just talking about giving things away is killing the boner i got from looking at the gold tv. thanks u fuckin asshole."

smogon gritted his neckbeard and left the room.

"anyway there is no cause for concern yet" sayed masuda as he taked out a dog and started eating it. "even with all his friends together red is no match for rr! wolfe and ray i want the 2 of you to go to the next town they r going 2 pass through and enter the vgc tournament there. when they see u cheating they will b inclined 2 enter and beat you. but i will make it so that anyone who enters that tournament has 2 sign a contract. if they lose they have 2 work in a dirt mine!"

"uh whats a dirt mine?" wolfe asked.

"oh its where they mine the materials we use to make our game cartridges. buying plastic is too expensive so we decided to cut corners."

"yes" sayed wolfe.

ray didnt say anything though. his hand was twitching uncomfortibly. "cheat... i need to cheat! aaaaah!" he began swinging his arms wildly like he was swatting at a fly that wasnt there. "fuck i need to cheat at something!"

"whats wrong with him?" masuda asked.

"hes going thru withdrawl" wolf explaned. "its been almost 20 minutes sinse he last cheated at something. quick get him an action replay before he loses his mind!"

giovanni gived ray a action replay and immediately the fake champion began pounding the buttons on his ds wildly.

"OH YEAH IT FEEELS SOOOOOO GOOOOD! 252 EVS INSTANTLY! ON EVERY STAT! YEAAAAAAH! FUCK BREEDING SO MUCH! BREEDING IS FOR FAAAAAAGGGGGGSSS! THE ONLY BREEDING I DO IS WITH HOOKERS! YEAAAAAAHH!"

"dont u have a girlfriend to?" masuda asked.

"RAY ONLY HAS A GIRLFRIEND... SO HE CAN CHEAT ON HER! YEAAAAAAHHHH! I. LOVE. CHEATING. SO MUUUUUCCCCHHHH!"

he sat there putting max evs on every single pokemon in the pc even tho he would not use all of them all while shouting and cheering every time he saw an illegal stat spread.

soon both reds group and the vgc cheaters arrived in the next town, lumiose city. there was going to be a vgc tournament held at the white flags amusement park later that day. red and his friends saw a big line waiting to signup.

"huh is that a vgc tournament?" verlis sayed. "u know i went undefeated in 10 of those except when they let my opponents cheat by timerstalling. i would enter if we had more time. but we need to find rr."

"yes" sayed red.

suddenly the sound of heavy rumbling came towards them. it was ray rizzo and wolfe glick riding a steamroller.

"time to get through this line the proper way!" ray explaimed. "BY CHEEAAAATING YEAAAAAAHHHH!"

he brutally mowed down everyone in the line before pulling up to a stop by the desk to enter.

"uh names?" the receptionist asked.

"RAY RIZZO MOTHERFUCKER! BUT DONT FUCKING WRITE THAT BIIIITTTCCH! USING MY REAL NAME IS PLAYING BY THE RULES! PUT HUGH MUNGUS COCK INSTEAD! YEAAAAAHHH!"

"and you, sir?" the receptionist asked wolfe.

wolfe just responded by blowing a mouthful of cigarette smoke in the receptionists face. "you know who i am. im actually a somebody in this world unlike you bitch! hahahahaha!"

"wow we cant just let these two douchebags enter and win" sayed red.

"yeah lol lets enter the vgc tournament and beat them" sayed verlis.

"wtf the people they ran over got blood on my hat!" lillie said angrily. "i cant believe those 2 assholes would do that. to my hat. im entering aswell to avenge it!"

"wolfe called me shit at pokemon like 2 storys ago" brendan added. "i cant let that douche get away with that either. i will enter 2."

and he did.


	10. Chapter 10

**chapter 10 swedish**

"so how does this tournemant work than lol?" red asked verlis. "u seem 2 know the most about them."

"yeah i never bother with tournaments" brendan added. "why bother going when i can already be the best player in the world without ever leaving my house thanks 2 the ladder!"

"basicaly the first round is called the swedish round" verlis exclaimed. "u fight agenst other trainers in double battles in single games and if u have enough wins by the end u go 2 the next round."

"oh thats good" sayed brendan. "best of 1 is my favorite. i hate it when i beat people with my metronome fissure team then they try 2 get a rematch. i just say 'gg scrub' and walk away laffing."

"but the actule finals r best of 3 right?" asked lillie.

"yes" sayed verlis.

"wtf thats so gay" brendan complaned. "how am i suposed to catch people off guard with my random movesets now?"

they went into the tournament and began playing the swedish rounds. the two vgc cheaters wolfe and ray won there first games easy. so did red, lillie and verlis. brendan dodged a near loss to a 5 year old kid after his metronome landed a lucky punishment against his opponents +6 azumarill.

"charizard use fire blast!" red comanded.

"zapdos use discharge!" lillie explaimed.

"wailord use heavy slam!" verlis inovated.

"CONKELDURR USE V-CREATE YEAAAAAAAHHHH!" ray cheated.

"judge disqualify my opponent!" wolfe insisted.

"wtf how did i lose already!" brendan groaned. "my opponent didnt even take a turn yet!"

"what did you think was going 2 happen if u had both ur pokemon use selfdestruct with a 2 pokemon team?" his opponent asked.

"i thinked it would kill all our pokemon and the judges would say i win since im the best and ur just a gay nerd."

the second round of swedish was over and everyone was 2-0 except brendan who was 1-1 now.

"brendan try not 2 lose again" red warned him. "since wolfe and ray mowed down half the people signing up for the tournament there will probly only b like 5 rounds of swedish. if u get 2 losses i doubt u can make it 2 the finals. at least use 4 pokemon and not just 2 lol."

"damn ur right" brendan sayed. "i wont lose the next game lol."

brendans opponent opened with landorus t and scrafty.

"landorus t? more like landorus zzzzz" brendan laffed. "let me show u what a real pokemon looks like kid. go farfetch'd! go clefable!"

"haha my landorus t' and my scrafty's intimidate lowers your attack by 2 stages you pathetic genwunner!" the manchild opponent sneered. "i only use superior pokemon from unova!" he tipped his fedora while making his boast. "i bet you think a pokeball with eyes is a good design you insufferable plebeian! you lack the taste to properly comprehend the near-shakespearian genius of balck and whites complex narrative!"

"oh yeah well ur gay!" brendan retorted. "farfetch'd use first impression! clefable use metronome!"

farfetch'd slash landed a crit on scrafty and the metronome became blizzard and killed lando-t while finishing off the weakened the scrafty.

"haha what a cuck!" brendan laffed as the unovabortion pulled his fedora down over his eyes in shame and ran away crying.

red, verlis and wolfe also won there games. lillie and ray actually had to face each other though. before the match began ray took out a machine gun and began using it to spray steroid needles at his own body.

"OH YEAH NOW I'M FUCKING PUUUUMMPPPEDD! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST GAME EVER! IM GOING TO CHEAT HARDER AND HARDER THAN EVER BEFORE HAHAHAHAHA!"

"uh judge he literally just admitted hes going to cheat" lillie sayed. "cant u ban him?"

the judge just made a snoring noise as he slumped over at his chair. sighing lillie sent out her first 2 pokemon knowing she wasnt going to get any help.

"go alakazam! go articuno!"

"HAHAHAHA ONLY 2?!" ray laffed like a maniac. "IM GOING TO SEND OUT... ALL 6 OF MY POKEMON AT THE SAME TIME YEEEEEAAAAAAHHH!"

he threw out pokeballs containing conkeldurr, hydreigon, terrakion, gothitelle, escavalier and thundurus.

"wtf!" lillie explaimed. "if your going to use 6 pokemon i will to!"

"JUDGE WAKE YOUR BITCH ASS UP THIS GIRLS GOING TO CHEEEEAAAATTTTTTT!" ray roared.

this actually got a reaction out of the judge who told lillie that ray using 6 pokemon is fine since no one stopped him at the time he did it, but if she did it it would b cheating

"fine... alakazam use gravity" lillie sayed. "articuno use icy wind!"

"ALL MY POKEMON USE YOUR STRONGEST ATTACKS AT THE SAME TIME HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" ray ordered.

lillies mons were able to land there moves but they both got koed by rays onslaught of attacks.

"she only gets two more pokemon like normal... RIGHT JUDGE?!" ray inquisitioned.

"of course" the judge agreed.

"thats ok" lillie said as she glared at ray, taking off her bloodstained hat crushing it in her hand. "because i only need 1 more turn to knock out ALL of your pokemon! u destroyed my awesome hat and now im going to destroy YOUR LIFE!"

she sent out rhydon and blastoise.

"choice specs blastoise use water spout from full health! choice band rhydon use earthquake! oh and since all your pokemon have been taken down to the ground by gravity and have been slowed down by icy wind i can go first AND hit all of them at once! ur fuckin dead kiddo!"

"WTF WHY DIDNT THEY BAN PEOPLE FROM USING STRATEGYS?!" ray explaimed. "JUUUUUUUUDDDGDGGGGGEEEEEE!"

despite his crys of protest all his pokemon were knocked out in the earthquake and water spout and lillie was declared the winner. ray was 2-1 now like brendan and the two of them got paired up as opponents in the next match.

"ok this is good" red telled brendan. "if u can beat ray as well we can knock him out of the tournament before he even makes it 2 top cut. "i will talk 2 the judge first and make sure hes not allowed to use 6 mons."

"thanks lol" brendan sayed. "i think this is finaly my time to prove myself as worthy of been ur aprentice. this cheating asshole is going to lose to my farfetch'd inovation for sure."

"maybe dont use metronome tho" red suggested. "actualy no wait it will probably be even worse if u try to pick moves urself. use metronome as much as possible actuly."

"good idea" sayed brendan. "that way he has no way of predicting my moves lol."

brendan and ray had there battle. ray sent out conkeldurr and thundurus. brendan sent out charizard and exeggutor.

"YOU CANT WIN FAAAAAGGGGGGG!" ray jeered. "WOLFE WAS TELLING ME ABOUT ALL THE BATTLES YOU LOST HAHAHA! FIRST TO RED, THEN TO N, THEN TO RED AND VERLIS, THEN TO LILLIE, THEN TO SMOGON AND NOW TO MEEEEEEEE! YOU ARE BASICALY THE YAMCHA OF THIS STORY YOU CUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK!"

"oh yeah well your just a troll" sayed brendan. "charizard use..."

"LALALALALA YOUR CHARIZARD CANT HEAR YOU LALALALALA!" ray shouted when brendan was trying to say his move.

"charizard use..."

"LALALALALALA! BRENDAN IS GAY! LALALALALA!"

because brendans pokemon couldnt hear him they couldnt attack and got taken out by thundurus' bolt strike and conkeldurr's v-create. gritting his white hair brendan sent out clefable and farfetchd.

"heres a megaphone to shout your moves with" verlis sayed throwing a megaphone to brendan.

"thanks bro im sure i can get him now" brendan smiled.

"HAHAHAHA FARFETCHD IS GAY AND DUMB JUST LIKE YOUR MOOOOOOOOMMM!" ray mocked. "IM NOT EVEN GOING 2 WASTE MY TIME ATTACKING THAT PEACE OF SHIT! USE CLOSE COMBAT AND FUSION BOLT TO KILL CLEFABLE YEEEAAAAHHHHH!"

"i knewed u would think farfetchd is shit and not evan attack it" brendan telled him. "so i made my clefable use protect and my farfetchd use brave bird on your cuckeldumb!"

"FUUUUCCCCCCKKKK!" ray roared as his mon got knocked out by the brave bird. "GO GOTHITELLE KILL THIS FAAGG! USE DARK VOOOOOOID! THUNDURUS USE FUSION BOLT! HIS CLEFABLE CANT PROTECT ANYMORE!"

"farfetchd use protect" brendan responded. "clefable use explosion"

clefable nearly died from thundurus but then blew up and allah snackbar'd all the mons on the field expect farfetch'd. now ray and brendan only had 1 mon left each.

"wtf when did brendan actuly get good at pokemon lol" red laffed.

"i watched a verlisify video and learned his secrets" brendan smiled.

"nice good work! now u can beat gay jizzo and finaly earn ur dignity!"

"yeah lol"

"THERES NOTHING U CAN DO NERD!" ray laffed. "MY LAST POKEMON IS HYDREIGON! AND ITS MORE THAN STRONG AND FAST ENOUGH TO KILL YOUR FAGFETCHD IN 1 HIT! U USED PROTECT LAST TURN AS WELL SO U CANT SURVIVE! EVEN IF U SOMEHOW LIVE NOTHING THAT SHIT BIRD HAS CAN KILL HYDREIGON IN 1 HIT! UR FINISHED!"

"thats what u think" brendan smiled. "i gave my farfetchd a set so powerful it will survive hydreigon AND kill it in one hit!"

BRING IT CUUUUCCCCKKK! HYDREIGON USE DRACO METEOR!"

"farfetchd use your focus sash to survive. then attack with acrobatics since your sash is destroyed!"

ray beginned to panic as he realised brendan really had a plan. his farfetchd lept into the air and unsheathed his leek like a generic anime swordsman diving down at the hydreigon. the farfetchd swung his leek in a single clean blow at the hydreigons middle head and landed putting his leek back in the sheath and expecting the hydreigon to colapse with its head falling off.

but it didnt.

"HAHAHAH UR SHITTY BIRD FAILED!" ray laffed. "HYDREIGON FINISH IT OFF WITH DARK PULSE!"

"oh no i lost" sayed brendan. "jk lol. farfetchd use quick attack!"

and it did and hydreigon died.


	11. Chapter 11

**chaptar 12 top cut**

after brenddan's fantastical victory over rat rizzo the battels continued with red, lillie, verlis, brendan and wolfe glick winning all of their game. the swedish round was over and now it was time for the top 8 to fite each other.

ray rizzo won his other games to but sinse he went 3-2 he was kiked out of the tournament.

"WHAT THATS NOT FIAR RAY IS MEANT TO WIN!" the cheater raged, as he picked up a phone. "HELLO POILICE THIS IS RAY FUCKING RIZZO! PUT THAT BITCH OBAMA ON THE PHONE I HAVE BEEN ROBED! TELL THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO GET ON THE PHONE RIGHT NOW! TELL HIM ITS HIS DADDY THE FUCKING KING OF VGC! WHAT?! DID YOU JUST HANG UP?! YOU DONT HANG UP ON RAY FUCKING RIZZO!"

ray got so angry he picked up the phone and throwed it onto the moon. jewnichi then apeared from a wormhole and walked up to ray.

"THIS IS BULLSHIT THE KING OF VGC CANT LOSE!"

"heheh sorry goy but you lost!" the merchant sneered. "i guess your not the king of vgc anymore lol. but il tell u what u can b. u can b the king of the dirt mine im sending to you!"

"FUCK OFF NERD I WILL NOT WORK IN UR SHITTY MINE!"

"thats where ur wrong goy"

jewnichi snaped his fingers and a wormhole apeared under ray and droped him into a dirt mine. he then went to find wolfe. "ah mr glicke my favorite vgc player" he said jewishly. "ive got a proposition for you goy."

wolfe glanced up boredly from his phone. the douchebag was in the process of telling the girl he had slept with last night that he has herpes and deliberately put holes in the condom he wore. "what do you want jewnichi? i have important business to take care of."

"indeed you do but thats why im here to talk to you. i have some brand new and very overpowered pokemon to offer you to use in top cut."

"im lissening."

"these r new pokemon from gen 8. i gived them unfair stats so they will easily beat red and his pathetic friends with they're gen 1 has-beens!"

"gen 8?" wolfe laffed. "but wasnt legend of red set in 2016? we r all supposed 2 b from that dimension so u shouldnt have even invented the gen 8 mons yet."

"but it said legend of lillie was 'a few years later' in its 9th chapter" jewnichi reminded him. "so the gen 8 abominations technicaly already existed during that story just no one ever menshined them lol."

"ok that surprisingly makes sense" wolfe agreed. "give me those horibel lookin mons then lol."

the top cut then begined. verlis was just fiting agenst some random but brendan had to fite wolfe and red had to fite lillie. the first match was verlis and the random.

"hahaha smogons cookie cutter sets are so good" laffed the random who was wearing a t-shirt that said 'conformity is king'. "i heard u r using these ridiculous sets that less than 0.2% of the ladder is playing. this will b a joke game."

"ur write" sayed verlis. "u r the joke tho u fuckin smogdrone lol. go wailord! go snorlax!"

"u just sent out ur mom" the random said. "go thundurus! go tornadus!"

3 turns later the random was screaming and crying like a madman as he rolled on the floor. all his pokemon had fallen 2 the behemoth that was verlis' wailord.

"i-it's not possible!" he cried. "if i use a special move! amnesia! if i use a physical move... stockpile! how... how can any one pokemon hold such power! its not POSIBBBBBLLLEEEEEE!"

he was taken away in a hospital to go to the ambulance to get his cookie cutter mind un-blown.

next it was brendan agenst wolfe.

"i cant belive ray lost to u" wolfe laffed as he blew a puff of smoke from his cig towards the cancer ward. "if it wasnt 4 u being a huge scrub i would have never lost to red and verlis back in 2016."

"wrong" sayed brendan. "go farfetchd! go charizard!"

"go corvinknight! go duraldon!"

two horibel unspeakabel abominashins came out of wolfes pokeballs. one was a giant creepypasta bird and the other was a giant metal penis."

"WTF" explaimed everyone in the park xcept masuda. even wolfe was a little taked back at how shit the designs were.

"my trusty farfetchd will not lose to these fakes" brendan sayed confidently. "the creepypasta bird is dark/flying i guess? and the giant dick is probably steel or something. maybe steel/electric in case its a vibrator."

"thats where ur wrong dweeb!" wolfe laffed. "its not just the designs on these things that are ridiculous! jewnichi gave them types that dont make sense either so they r even more powerful! now go! corviknight use skin crawler! duraldon use bad dragon blitz!"

"oh god i think im goin 2 need therapy after this" brendan cryed. "farfetchd and charizard use protect!"

"heheheh im not done yet u fuckin looser!" wolfe jeered. "now i use... gigantimax! corviknight and duraldon digivolve into ur gigantimax formes!"

two giant speakers popped out of the ground and started playing the theme tune 4 the abominashins:

digimon! digimon!

digimon digital abominashins! digimon r the cuckolds!

digimon deviantart monsters! digimon's our new standard!

change into overdesigned creatures!

to save the cashgrab world!

digimon! deviantart cuckolds! digimon!

after wolfes abominashins had finished digivolving they were now 300 foot tall and their horibel designs could be seen by every1 in the white flags amusement park. all there eyes droped out xcept the main characters sinse they were used to dealing with abominashins.

"my farfetchd and charizard r safe from ur abominashins" brendan sayed.

"wrong sayed wolfe. "when my mons digivolve they get the strength of a mega evolution with the power of z-moves!"

"wtf brendan explaimed!"

"and z-moves can go through protect so ur pathetic littel friends r finished!"

charizard was taked out but luckily farfetchd had on his focus sash witch let him live with 1hp. brendan then sented out his clefable. wolfe had ben drowned and his bad dragon product attack again but clefable used follow me to draw there attacks so farfetchd could attack. farfetchd used mirror move against the creepypasta bird and copyed its fake z-move witch killed it.

"very clever" wolfe said as he gritted his middle finger. "go..." he was about to send out another abominashin but stoped himself and taked out his dream ball. "go raichu."

"oy vey!" jewnichi explaimed. "ur suposed 2 b using my gen 8 mons, goy! this whole battel was to show every1 that my new mons r betta then these washed up gen 1 schmucks!"

wolfe just flipped him the bird and continued the battel. "i dont need these fakes to beat u!" wolfe told brendan. "in fact im going to destroy u with only my signature mon."

"fine" sayed brendan. "ill do the same. well kinda."

wolfe returned the bad dragon product to its digiball and brendan sent out a ditto which used its impostor to transform into farfetchd. he then sent the real farfetchd back to its ball.

"this isnt like u" brendan sayed. "usualy ur just a douche and a cheater but this time ur actuly fighting honorably. has fiting me and seeing the bond i have with my real pokemon maid u want 2 change ur ways?"

"no lol" laffed wolfe as he vaped some gamer girl bathwater and blew it in jewnichis face. "the only reason i am doing this is 2 piss off jewnichi the faggot by not using his garbage mons! and by beating u in a fair match it proves that ur just as shit at pokemon as u always were! hahahaha! raichu use thunderbolt!"

"farfetchd use flail!"

"holy shit ur stuped" wolfe laffed. "u left the focus sash on ur real farfetchd. this is vgc so u cant use the same item twice. im going 2 win."

"oh yeah wel its a good thing i have a focus BAND on my ditto"

"oh fuck" wolfe sayed as the ditto survived with 1hp and then used a full power flail on his raichu. "hahaha just kidding u fucking retard! i have focus sash too! now go raichu! use quick attack and send this retard back to the cuck shed!"

and it did.

"fuck" brendan sayed. "i cant belive i lost in a fair match against this faggot"

"thats right bitch" wolfe laffed. "thats what happens when u fight the wolfe of wall street motherfucker!" wolfe then drove off to the foster home in his limo so he could throw rocks at orphans.

"and thats not all" jewnichi added. "now ur going 2 the dirt mine to make cartridges for my company 4 the rest of ur life!"

oh no" sayed brendan as he felled threw the wormhole.

"wtf" sayed red and lillie and verlis.

"oh did u not read the contract when u joined this tournament?" jewnichi asked them. "the losers go to the dirtmines! hahahahaha!"


	12. Chapter 12

**chapter 12 red vs lillie**

"what r we suposed to do about this tournament?" sayed red as he began reading the contacts they had signed when they entered. "it says as soon as you lose in the tounrament u have to work in jewnichi's dirt mine for the rest of your life on chinese minimum wage."

"so even if 1 of us wins the tournament every1 else gets sent there" sayed lillie.

"yes" sayed verlis.

"damn it we cant lose anyone else lol" sayed red. "but we have to fite next lillie."

"yeah it sucks" sayed lillie. "we should just fite as best as we can so that whoever is stronger will b left to stop jewnichi."

"your right" red agreed. "lets see how much stronger u hav gotten since when we 1st met. it is a shame this is probably the last time we will get 2 fite each other in this series tho and it has 2 be in doubles aka the fake format. i want 2 fite my aprentise in singles like in the best game pokemon red."

verlis smiled. "i guess it is time. i will show u the sacred format of vgc singles. now the 2 of u can have the climactic final battel u wanted."

verlis telled red and lillie how vgc singles work. of course vgc singles is a sacred format and im not goin 2 explain it in case any fuckin smogdrones r reading and want 2 ruin vgc singles by taking over it.

speaking of smogon... back at rr castle the koffing headed manchild was spying on red and lillie thru jewnichi's golden tv. "eww i cant watch" he groaned. "there going 2 have a singles match and its probably not even going to last 10 turns. where is the fun in a singles game when no1 stalls?"

"and even worse they breeded for there pokemon" kaphotics shuddered. "it reminds me of when i was in high school."

kaphotics began having traumatic flashbacks. in his flashback he saw a jock talking 2 a cheerleader.

"hey baby wanna see my 5iv charizard?" the jock said.

"oh my god thats so alpha. i cant believe ur so hardcore uve already bred 15 pokemon. u can have me anytime u want."

meanwhile another jock noticed kaphotics and stepped in front of him. "well well well if it isnt little kaphy! what u got there nerd?" before kaphotics could anser the jock snatched his pokeball. "haha look at this guys!" he held up the pokeball for every1 to see. "his mon doesnt even have a single perfect iv! this nerd doesnt even know how to breed!"

"sh-shut up yes i do i-i just dont want to breed!" kaphotics stuttered. "i-im waiting until i find the right pokemon i want to breed!"

the whole school began laffing at him. "no ur not u fucking faggot" the jock laffed as he sent out kaphotics mon. "look its a volcarona! this nerd doesnt just not have the skill to breed he also uses fake pokemon!"

"eww like... what kind of virgin doesnt even know how to breed?" laffed the cheerleader girls.

"your an embarrassment get out of my skool!" the principal yelled.

"im disowning u u fucking failure!" roared kaphotics dad.

"n-no NOOOOOOO!" kaphotics cried as his flashback ended and he realised he was back in rr castle. "its not fair. all the alphas r just born with the skill 2 breed. they hav a unfair advantage. thats y we need 2 change the rules. make a world where we can be on top for once. then all the girls from my highschool will b begging 2 dress up as my favorite anime waifus and come live in my moms basement with me!"

"ur right" agreed smogon. "the world is not fair 2 beta cucks like us. thats why i made my website. 2 ban all the alpha strategys and only let stall win."

"lol gay" sayed giovanni. "i just want to use pokemon to steal money so i can open a restaurant and sell spaghetti and meatballs. what kind of homos need there villains 2 have cheesy backstorys like u 2 fags? r u unovabortions or something haha?"

"n-no!" stuttered kaphotics and smogon as they hid there pokeballs sinse they were full of volcaronas and garbodors.

meanwhile back at the vgc tournament red and lillie were starting there fite. lillie had out her moltres while red had out his magmar.

"isnt it great fiting with the pokemon we actualy breeded?" red said to his aprentise. "seeing all that hard work pay off is so satisfying!"

"yeah lol" lillie agreed. "sinse im good at breeding pokemon every1 at my skool thinks im cool which means when im old enough 2 start dating i will actuly be able to get boys who arent 600 lbs neckbeards with waifus pillows."

"wtf 11 is more thn old enough" kaphotics and smogon both sayed as they watched them fiting from the tv

"most of my waifus r UNDER 11!" kaphotics added.

"most of my admins actual girlfriends are lol" smogon added as well.

finally lillie and reds actule battel could happen. magmar used thunderbolt which dealed a lot of damage to moltres while lillie used her bird to set up sunny day.

"interesting move" red admited. "but sunny day will only make my magmar even stronger. use thunderbolt again!"

it did and moltres got nocked out but then lillie sent out tangela. the sun made tangela faster with chlorophyll and it used ancientpower to kill magmar. red then sent out rhydon. tangela was faster and used giga drain but rhydon survived with 1hp because of sturdy and then used megahorn to kill tangela. lillie sent our her final mon which was her charizard. it was faster then rhydon and killed it with solarbeam. red sent out his last mon to which was his charizard. the charizards stared at each other. lillies charizard used 2 b on reds team so it remembered reds zard well.

"fire blast!" both of them commanded at the same time. even though the zards were fire type the sun made them do a lot of damage. both of the zards had almost no health left.

it was at that point red relised a plan.

"i guess it comes down to a speed tie" lillie shrugged.

"yeah maybe" red replied.

"fire blast!"

"flare blitz!"

reds zard won the speed tie and rammed into lillies with the flare blitz. it knocked out her charizard but then fainted from the recoil. both of them had no mons left.

"haha even better" jewnichi laffed as he rubbed his hands together. "now both of u r goin 2 the dirt mine!"

"not quite" red smirked. "ur contract says as soon as u lose in the tournament. we didnt lose. we both tied. so were both out of the tournament without either of us losing. u cant send either of us."

jewnich began gripping his inhaler with such anger that it snapped in half. he gritted his spearnose and went back to rr castle.


	13. Chapter 13

**chapter 13 verliswolf vs. wolfe glick**

with both red and lillie being eliminated from the draw there was only 3 ppl left in the tourney now, verlisify, wolfe and haunter (the smogon admin).

sinse wolfe was busy dancing on the graves of war heros they decided 2 put him in the final automaticaly and make verlis fite haunter.

"heh heh ive got a date with a hot 3 year old after this" haunter drooled as he prepared to send out his pokemon.

"wow im going 2 call chris hansen after this" sayed verlis. "go charizard! go wailord!"

"heh heh im going 2 send out my waifus" haunter sayed. "go musharna! go reuniclus! these mons r so hot. i wish there were more women this age looking to date."

they were about 2 fite but then haunter got arrested for public masturbation after he saw his own mons. verlis winned the game by default.

"looks like its time 4 the finals" one of the judges sayed. "someone call mr glick and tell him 2 get hear." and one of them did.

"what the fuck do u want lol?" wolfe ansered as he picked up the phone. "im busy right now and this is fucking hilarious. this kids grandma just died so im stealing the ashes so i can blow them in his face haha!"

"mr glicke u need 2 come here right now or we will have 2 disqualify u and make verlisify the new regional champion"

"oh what the fuck!" wolfe yelled as he slammed down the phone. "theres no way that fuckin furry faggot is ever going 2 be champion of anything for as long as i breathe! chauffeur! take me back to the tournament! and dont even stop to run over children crossing the road this time!"

as he drived back wolfe hanged out the window holding a rake so he could scratch all the parked cars they passed. he got out the limo as soon as possibel and begin running inside. "get the fuck out faggot!" he yelled, throwing a disabled woman out of her electric wheelchair so he could get in. he drived it as fast as he could and crashed it into the side of the stage where the final match would be held grinning at verlis as he dusted himself off.

"well well well if it isnt furlisify!" he jeered. "i cant belive u evan entered a tournament without crying about perfectly legal mons being hacked!" he tossed his dream ball up and down as he aproached the chalenger. "ur about to learn pretty quick what happens when u venture outside of your little youtube channel though u punkass bitch!"

"your just a troll" verlis responded.

"haha is that the best u can do cuck?!" wolfe spat. "i was expecting better trashtalk after all the shit u had 2 say about me on ur littel twitter account. gess it getting banned must have breaked ur spirit haha!"

"no i just know how a real champion is suposed to behave" verlis told him. "u r not a champion. u r a cheater and a fake. and im goin 2 prove it."

"u seem confident lol. how about we put up a little wager?" wolfe told him. "when i beat u u have 2 burn ur fursuit on livestream!"

"ok fine" verlis agreed. "and when i beat u u hav 2 donate $20 to charity."

"eww wtf?!" wolfe puked. "how about if u win i just shoot myself? id rather do that than ever help anyone lol."

"fine" verlis agreed. "lets battel! go wailord! go ditto!"

"alright! go durexdildo! go coldsteelviknight!"

as the fakemon abominashins came out verlis ditto used impostor to morph into the metal dildo.

"now i copied ur broken pokemons power!" verlis smirked.

"why dont u take a betta look at ur ditto looser?!" wolfe taunted. the ditto decided to commit suicide rather than turn into a giant metal dick.

"fuck im sorry ditto!" verlis apologised. "i use clefairy then!"

"damn it verlis!" red groaned. "i know u want 2 inovate verlis... but u go 2 far by using fakemons! even with ur brilliant sets u shud never stop using the originel 151!"

"red i know ur taste in pokemon is gud" verlis telled him. "but only using 151 pokemon limits my creativity! there is only so much i can innovate 151 mons! i need moar!"

"just focus on the fite!" red telled him. "u have 2 beat this cheater!"

"more like i hav 2 beat off all over ur moms face!" wolfe jeered. "gen 8 abominashins gigantimax! then coldsteel use ur special power! dildo use steel plated penetration!"

"ur abominashins wont beat my wailord" verlis sayed confidently.

"u think that pathetic heavy slam wailord is a match for the power of my digimon?" wolfe laffed. "to bad i picked a physical move and a special one! it doesnt matter which defence u increase!"

"its just 2 bad this isnt my heavy slam wailord!" verlis told him "heavy slam wailord is inovation. but this is... to go beyond innovation! my wailord will eliminate both of ur mons in the same turn!"

"ur lying!" wolfe denied.

"most people overlook wailords 60 speed!" verlis explaimed. "but when equiped with a choice scarf that speed reaches a level evan gr8r than that of a garchomp! and when wailord is at full health it can use water spout at full power! and thats not all! my clefairy will use helping hand to make it even stronger! both of ur mons r finished!"

"oh nooooooo!" wolfe cried as his mons were wiped out by the innovated skittyfucker. he looked down at his remaining pokeballs. he had 2 more gen 8 abominashins that jewnichi gived him. he placed his hand on the digiballs which contained the sword and shield legendary pokemon. horibel visions flashed past his eyes of him standing there defeated by verlis and his wailord. "i cant use these fakes." he relised. "how did i win the 2016 worlds? it wasnt JUST because i cheated. no. i knowed something the other vgc cheaters didnt know. i knowed the power of the originel 151. that is how i won. my raichu wont fail me hear. go raichu! go charizard!"

"these 2 r no match for my inovation wolfe" verlis telled him. "do the same combo again."

"not goin 2 work this time idiot" wolfe jeered. "raichu is faster than ur gaylord even with a choice scarf! use thunderbolt!"

the raichu used its thunderbolt. wailord survived because of clefairys friend guard but barely had any health. by the time it used water spout it was weak as shit and didnt even kill charizard.

"charizard use flare blitz on cle... wait i dont need 2 make up an insult, it litrally has fairy in the name lol! go kill that faggot!"

zard attacked and left clefairy with only half its health. verlis was backed into a tough corner. his wailord was choice locked into water spout which was not able to do good damage anymore. he had his clefairy use protect to save itself while wailord attacked again in vain and was taken down by zard and raichu.

"my last pokemon" verlis sayed. "but what should i use?"

"uve got this verlis!" red cheered. "just send out ur rhydon and hes finished!"

"no" verlis sayed with a smile. "i have an innovative set which will destroy both of his mons in 1 turn just like wailord did to the first ones! go bastiodon!"

"no what are you doing?!" red gasped. "that thing is fuckin teribel!"

"not with my inovation its not!" verlis smiled. "this thing is built with the lowest speed posibel. clefairy will go first and use gravity. then my bastiodon will use earthquake and beat both his mons with super effective damage! it has choice band to get around its shit attack stat to. and its defences r super high and boosted further by friend guard! this cant fail!"

"oh u r so fuckin wrong!" wolfe cackled. "raichu... use encore! trap that stupid clefairy in helping hand! now charizard use earthquake on that gayasstiodon!"

"no!" verlis explaimed. "how can my inovation b failing me!"

bastiodon used earthquake witch hurted raichu enough 2 put it on 1hp. it survive with its focus sash. zard dodged the attack altogether bcos of it being a flying type. zards earthquake left both clefairy and bastiodon with almost no health.

"i... i can still win!" verlis sayed. it seemed like he was tryin 2 convince himself as much as he was tryin 2 convince wolfe.

"verlis u have no1 2 blame but urslef" red telled him as he shaked his head. "u saw ur innovation. u got cocky. u thought u were a god and u could ascend beyond the rules of nature. but the original 151 will always beat the fakes. wolfe knew that like any good mew-fearing man. u thought u WERE mew. and now u r goin 2 lose 4 ur blasphemy."

"hahaha thats right furlisigay! raichu use thunderbolt! charizard use flare blitz! end the furry's stuped mons!"

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" verlis cried as his trusted inovated mons fell before him.

it was over. he was forced 2 burn his fursuit in front of everyone before being pushed through the wormhole into the dirt mine by jewnichi. red just gave him a look of disappointment as he fell down the wormhole to meet his fate. wolfe was laffing uncontrollably pouring himself a hearty cup of orphan tears into the trophy he had won 4 the tournament. how will verlis ever redeem himself for betraying the originel 151? how will he and verlis ever get out of the dirt mine? find out next time on... a better fanfic than anything whitefri2z could ever write!


	14. Chapter 14

**chapter 14 breakout  
**

"hahaha i win loosers!" wolfe mocked. "i have something special planned 4 u fags to celebrate my win here!"

a helicopter with a giant tank of water attached to it descended towards the tournament and soaked the ground with fucktons of water. wolfes chauffeur drove wolfes limo towards the douchebag champion so he could get in and then they drive through the puddle and drench everyone in the tournament.

"later cucks!" he jeered spitting a loogie in the face of some kid through his window as he sped off.

"wow what a douche" said lillie.

"yeah lol" red agreed. "anyway we need 2 get 2 rr's base. since the world is linear like all pokemon games besides gen 1 we should just keep walking in a straight line. i guess we will end up in ur home alola next."

"alolas not my home" lillie insisted. "when im older im going 2 move 2 kanto permanently. then im going 2 become president of kanto so i can nuke alola and all the fake regions."

"thats not right" sayed red. "the fake regions r shit but we can fix them. we just need to deport all the fake pokemon and all the hackers and smogdrones to some random island. then nuke that island."

"what if we deport them to unova insted of a island?" lillie sugested.

"ok fine fuck unova lol" red agreed. "anyway lets keep going. im sure we will c moar members of rr soon.

meanwile at rr castle...

"excellent verlis and brendan r finished!" jewnichi reported gleefuly while he put a kosher puppy pie in the oven. "now we just need to stop red and lillie. wolfe is to busy partying right now so it is your turn smogon and giovanni."

"just one thing jewnichi" smogon sayed. "when verlis and brendan fited wolfe they were tricked into signing a contract which sends them 2 the dirt mine if they lose. if we beat lillie and red nothing permanent will happen 2 them. they will just black out and have to give us half there money." at the menshin of money jewnichi started jerking off. "give me back my full power so i can use the final battel clause to make the loser of our battle get banned from existense like last time i fited red."

hearing about giving killed jewnichis boner. "no goy i alredy told u there r only 2 things in this world that i will never do! one of them things is spend longer than 2 months developing a pokemon game! and the other is give anything to anyone! u schlups need to figure out how to do this on your own!"

"lets just get guns and shoot them" giovanni suggested.

"lol good idea lets do that" sayed smogon.

red and lillie then arrived at alola. smogon and giovani standed in there way with machine guns.

"time to sleep with the corphishes red!" giovanni laughed as he opened fire.

"eww why would i want to sleep with a fake mon?" red replied as he opened his jacket and pushed lillie behind him.

he got hit with hundreds of bullets but they all just bounced off his chest and didnt do any damage.

"wtf lol?!" sayed giovanni.

"i spent like 10 years living out in the wilderness on top of a freezing mountain" red telled him. "that made me way too buff to get hurt by bullets lol. now go charizard! burn these 2 fags with flamethrower!"

"oh fuck not again" sayed smogon as he and giovanni got burned to fuck. red and lillie just stepped over the burned villains as they continued on there way.

as this was happening another story was unfolding. deep in the depths of jewtendo's dirt mine a exhausted brendan was trying to figure out what 2 do. he had been mining for days and his white hair was now almost completely brown from the dirt. verlis, ray and all the other ppl who lost in the vgc tournament were there as slaves.

"red and even lillie isnt hear now" brendan relised. "im the closest thing to a main character that is left. if i dont take charge of the situation now no one will."

"r-ray cant go on..." ray rizzo groaned weakly as he lay curled up in the fetal position. it had been 3 days since he cheated at anything and his body was succumbing to withrawl.

verlis was sitting in the corner on his own not talking to anyone. he was so disappointed in himself 4 losing to wolfe that he also couldnt go on either. he felt like as big of an asshole as the vgc cheaters and smogon 4 disrespecting the original 151 and thinking his innovation was betta than them.

"holy shit this is so depressing" brendan sayed. "u fags need to stop moping around and help us break out."

"why so i can let everyone down again?" verlis sayed. "i dont deserve to b the most subbed poketuber in the world. my innovation is all lies."

"r-ray's body feel not right" ray groaned. "ray cant move."

"ok first of all verlis the only reason i even beat ray and stopped being a scrub is because of ur vids. and ray. u cant move because u havent cheated for 3 days. but what is a prison break? its cheating isnt it? ur not doing the sentence u agreed 2. ur breaking the rules."

"d-did u say... CHEAT?!" ray said with new life in his eyes. "FUCK YEEEESSSSS! RAY IS BACK! WHERE DO WE START?!"

"r u srs?" verlis asked. "u went from trying to copy gym leader ingame teams to topping a regional just from watching my vids?"

"well kinda" brendan sayed. "to tell the truth the thing that has been holding me back so long is a fear of not been good enough. i used to b the champion of hoenn and i thought i was great. then red destroyed me in a battel and telled me everything i knowed was wrong. having everything u thought you had taken away from u like that. it breaks a man. ever since then i tried every shortcut i could 2 get back to being as good as i thought i was. but nothing i tried worked. i watched ur video to try and git gud but then it hit me. the reson u r so good is bcos u dont just copy other ppls shit or take shortcuts other ppl give u. u make ur own sets with the shit u alredy know. so thats what i did. i taked everything i learned from all my losses and made a team that could win."

"why did u tell red it was from my video then?"

"idk i thought saying all this shit then would ruin the pace of the story by been top serious lol. anyway lets break out of this fucking mine."

"HOW ARE WE BREAKING OUT?!" ray asked.

"the way i see it the only thing keeping us in hear is the warden" brendan explained. "unfortunatly he taked away all our pokemon so we cant just beat him. but if someone distracts the warden someone else can steal our mons back."

"how r we goin 2 distract him?" verlis asked.

"dont worry i know this guy" brendan sayed. "hes from our world. and hes not very bright lol."

suddenly all the other prisoners went quiet and started mining much faster than they were before. "oh no its the warden" one of them sayed. brendan and the others started mining again to.

"we are WAY behind schedule" whined a lispy gay voice. it was joe merrick AKA serebii! "lord jewnichi wont give me my good boy points for this week if u slackers fall behind on production so you better start mining faster or else!"

"OR ELSE WHAT CUCK?!" ray shouted as he ranned up and punched serebii in the face. unfortunately serebii was wearing state of the art nintendo labo armour and since ray was suffering steroid withdrawl his punch was not strong enough to pierce the armour.

"or else ill do this!" serebii yelled shrilly. "go machamp!"

"haha u just sent out ur wifes boyfriend!" brendan mocked.

"fuck u that was only 1 time!" serebii sayed. "and she told me the machamps cock was only 5 inches bigger than mine anyway."

"HOW BIG WAS THE MACHAMPS COCK, 5 INCHES?!" ray asked.

"quick go and get out pokeballs whle me and ray distract him" brendan whispered to verlis.

"no it was 6 inches!" serebii pouted as he took out a bottle of soylent. "machamp go and beat up these meanies!"

"get behind me civilians!" brendan telled the others. "i am a trained mall cop i can handle this!"

brendan fited against the machamp for a bit blocking its punches with the martial arts he had studyed on his elite mall cop training course. unfortunatly days of being in the mine and only being able to eat whatever soy-based food they stole from serebii's fridge had weakened his body. he couldnt keep up with the machamps strength for long and was knocked down to the ground.

"how did that feel 'officer'?" serebii mocked with a giant soy grin on his face.

"probably the same way u felt after tyrone beat your ass and fucked your girl" brendan retorted.

"fuck u!" serebii growled getting so angry he attempted to crush the bottle of soylent in his hand. he only ended up brusing his hand though.

"brendan i got our mons back!" verlis called out as he throwed a pokeball to brendan.

"nice!" brendan grinned. "now we can beat this cuck for good! go farfetch'd!"

"like im going to lose 2 u!" serebii groaned. "machamp use stone edge!"

"lol what a predictable move" brendan sayed. "if u used rock slide u might have winned. but obviously u dont have the skill to make it flinch so u didnt try! farfetch'd use acrobatics!"

farfetchd used a focus sash to survive the stone edge and then ohko'd machamp with acrobatics. with his machamp ko'd serebii had nothing left to protect him. verlis and ray sent out their mons too and surrounded him.

"oh no daddy jewnichi save me!" serebii cried as the mons tore up his labo armour and then beat his ass. brendan and the others hurried to the exit.


	15. Chapter 15

**chaptwr 14 shoahdown with jewnichi**

brendan kept running towards the entrance of the mine. light shined down on them from outside and they were seconds away from freedom. then a big nosed shadow snuffed out the light of freedom.

"heheheh well now what do we have hear?" cackled jewnichi as he standed in there way. "my sinuses are acting up something fierce! and theres only one thing which sets my allergies off this badly! thats right its... MY EMPLOYEESS TAKING UNPAID BREAKS! i hope u all have good reasons to be up here. because if not im going to sue you! and jewtendos legal team is nothing to sneeze at. just ask all the lets players, streamers and melee tornaments that we bully on a daily basis! hahaha!"

"how do u get away with it?" brendan asked.

"how do i get away with what?!" jewnichi laffed. "treating the walking wallets that are my fans like the trash that they are?!"

"no i mean how do u threaten melee tournaments with legal action?" he elaborated. "everyone knows melee players are way too fat to fit in a courthouse!"

"oh thats simple. they r mentaly considered minors so it would be there mommies that have to appear in court insted."

"oh lol. anyway ur not goin 2 stop us leaving jewnichi."

"yeah" sayed verlis.

"yeah" sayed ray."

"yeah" sayed a random man who was at the vgc tournament.

"yeah sayed a random girl who was at the vgc tournament.

"yeah" sayed a her twin brother.

they all sented out there best pokemon at the same time.

"that wont b enough 2 stop me" jewnichi laffed. he snapped his finger and a bunch of wormholes opened up behind him. abominashins worse than anything they had ever seen started coming out of the wormholes. jellyfish with no faces. anorexic cockroach girls. buff cockroaches with no heads. literal cables that walked around.

"oh my god what the fuck are those things?!" brendan explaimed.

"this is the future of the pokemon series!" jewnichi cackled. "behold my ultra abominashins! the modern art of the pokemon world! thats right fools! we have now lowered the bar for pokemon designs so far it is inside the earths core!"

"how have we strayed so far from the original 151's light?!" verlis gasped.

the vgc players tried to fite back agenst the ultra abominashins but their 600 bst powercreep was too strong 4 their pokemon to handel.

"ill stop this faggot!" brendan sayed. "if i beat jewnichi maybe the wormholes will go away and the abominashins will stop coming. can u keep them busy verlis?"

"yeah ive got a plan" verlis sayed. "i will call out an army of elite pokemon trainers with my special power. they will help us hold back the abominashins."

verlis climbed up onto a high rock and called out "WELCOME BACK WOLFPACK! VERLIS HERE!" immediately an army of verlis subscribers armed with his inovated pokemon sets began charging towards the mine in order to back up the vgc players. although the abominashins were strong they were now outnumbered by the army of vgc players and verlis subscribers. brendan ranned forwards to confront jewnichi.

"heheheh not bad goy!" jewnichi laffed. "but do u really think u can defeat me? the ceo of jewtendo! the creator of pokemon itself! u realy think a faggot from hoenn can beat me?!"

"yes"

"oh ok then."

brendan reached for his first pokeball and sent out farfetchd. jewnichi sent out his which was hypno.

"yellow skin, a big nose, its like looking in the mirror!" jewnichi cackled. "hypno use psychic!"

"not so fast" brendan sayed. "farfetchd use first impression!"

farfetchd used its priority to go first and knocked hypno out in 1 hit with the super effective attack. however jewnichi only started laffing as his mon got knocked out.

"u r goin 2 wish u just let my hypno beat u after u see what i have in store 4 u!" jewnichi telled brenda. "just wait until u see this! go fakefetchd!"

jewnichi throwed out a pokeball and to brendans horror what came out was a farfetchd. only it was bigger and gayer looking and instead of a leek it was holding a floppy green dildo.

"what the fuck is that thing?!" brendan explaimed.

"oh this is fakefetchd!" jewnichi laffed. "this is the new evolution for farfetchd we r adding in gen 8!"

"NOOOOOOOO!" brendan raged. "thats it u r goin down u fucking cunt! farfetchd use slash!"

"fakefetchd use slash as well!" jewnichi sayed.

the two birds ran at each other swinging the leek and dildo at each other like samurai weeb swords. fakefetchd got cut by the leek and farfetchd got slapped by the dildo. fakefetchd seemed fine but farfetchd was nearly dead.

"i added 300 bst to farfetchd after it evolved into fakefetchd!" jewnichi explained. "now if u want farfetchd to keep up with the powercreep u will have to evolve it into this! hahahaha!"

"never!" brendan refused. "farfetchd come back! go charizard! mega evolve into charizard x and use flare blitz!"

"alright fakefetchd come back" jewnichi sayed. "go charizard! digivolve into giganifag charizard and use flare blitz!"

both of the charizards transformed but jewnichis was way stronger.

"hahaha too bad goy! megas r outdated. they were too much work coming up with cool designs. these designs we stole from deviantart r much easier to add! gigantimongs have 2000 bst so they will powercreep all the old mons."

"how could u turn a charizard into that fucking pile of shit?" brendan sayed looking at the hideous abominashin that standed before him. "holy shit ur gay. ur even worse than the kids who come to my mall and stick there chewing gum on the bottoms of the tables! ur worse than the people on gamefaqs who tell me that mall cops r not real police officers! ur even worse than the people who subscribe to shofu! im goin 2 beat the shit out of u for turning all my favorite mons into fags!"

brendan taked out his mall cop nightstick and ran up to jewnichi swinging for his giant nose. he was about to hit him but then jewnichi flew into the air on a wire avoiding the attack.

"oh fuck i forgot u were chinese as well as jewish" brendan sayed.

"thats right!" jewnichi gloated as he landed in front of brendan and karate chopped his nightstick in half. "what is a mere mall cop going 2 do against a kung fu master?! id say about as much as ur outdated original 151 are going to do against my abominashins! now digizard finish off his mega charizard x!"

the giant digimon nocked out brendans charizard with its next move. brendan kept sending out mons to fite it but none of them were even close 2 its power. he soon relised that the only way they would be able to keep up with the abominashins was by inovating new sets especialy to beat them. he had not come prepared tho and there was nothing he could do.

"i need to get out of hear" brendan relised. "i can warn red and lillie about the digimon so they can beat them."

"not goin 2 happen" jewnichi sayed. "u work 4 me now remember? now let me send out my final mon. go mewtwomon!"

jewnichi sent out a mewtwo except it was a gay digimon with a long floppy dick instead of a tail and it was wearing armour like in the first movie except the armour was made out of nintendo labo and it had a soybeard.

"mewtwomon is the ultimate pokemon" jewnichi explained. "i created it by combining the dna of mewtwo with the dna of the biggest soycuck nintendrones i could find. what it created was an abomination with ungodly power! it uses the psychic power of mewtwo to force its soy dna inside the people it defeats turning ordinary inteligent consumers into weakminded nintendrones! and now im going 2 use its power on u brendan! ur going 2 work for me!"

"fuck off lol" brendan sayed. "im alpha af like all mall cops. u will never turn me into one of ur cucks!"

"lets put that theory to the test! mewtwomon use psoystrike!"

with no pokemon left to protect him brendan was hit by the psoystrike and it imediately started taking effect. his beautiful white hair began to slowly recede. his proud mall cop uniform morphed into cardboard. the dollars he earned at his job morphed into good boy points. his 5 o clock shadow grew out into a neckbeard. finally his muscles and dick withered away and his gut expanded out. the transformation was complete.

"what is ur favorite pokemon?" jewnichi asked.

"duraldon the giant metal dildo" brendan ansered.


	16. Chapter 16

while brendan and jewnichi were fiting, verlis and his subscribers managed to defeat all the ultra abominashins. they were about to help brenan but it was to late. he had already been turned into a soyboy by mewtwomon.

"how nice of u to bring all ur subcribers for me to convert!" jewnichi laffed. "although they are called the wolfpack. maybe they would taste nice like dog. mewtwomon can even add the soy sauce for free!"

"wtf u cant eat my subs" verlis sayed. "wolfpack run away and live to innovate another day!"

"dammit" jewnichi cursed. "i don have enough abominashins left to chase them all down. i will have to go to deviantart to get some more laer."

"allow me lord jewnichi" sayed brendan. "i have 2 conditions tho. first of all i want 100 good boy points and secondly i want u 2 make sure my girlfriend is properly satisfied."

"look im a jew and a chinese" jewnichi sayed. "that is like the two smallest dicks on the planet put together. im lucky the length of my dick isnt a negative number. u will have 2 find someone else 2 plesure ur girlfriend. i can give u enough gbp to buy a weeks supply of tendies and nintendo labo though."

"ok lol" brendan sayed. "i will destroy these wolffags. go durexdildo!"

brendan sent out the giant metal penis and climbed on its back life he was getting on his bull's cock. the bad dragon toy flew into the sky like the penis rocket from austin powers.

"duraldon use semen stream!" brendan comanded. the dragon dildo fired a stream of white energy down at the wolfpack. it left them all looking like bukake victims and they killed themselfs as a result.

"fuck i cant let him do that to my subs" verlis sayed. "go arcanine!"

brendan flyed down and landed in front of verlis. "so it comes to this, furry vs scaly? we should be on the same side verlis. join us today and jewnichi will let u buy the new version of the nintendo switch for 1% cheaper than the original. its the exct same thing as the originel except now the joycons can be used as dildos to pleasure urself while ur bull is fucking ur girl."

"no wtf" verlis sayed. "u didnt used to be a nintendrone cuck. u used to be a proud mall cop remember?"

"a mall cop?" brendan spat. "eww gross why would i want to go to work when my girlfriend and my welfare checks can provide for me?"

"i guess the only way to save u is 2 beat u" verlis decided. "arcanine use close combat!"

"duraldon use bukake blaster!"

arcanine was faster than the giant dick and punched it in half with close combat.

"wtf" brendan sayed. "my mon lost in 1 hit. how can i be bad at pokemon when i spend 18 hours a day playing it?"

"damn hes still soy" verlis relised. "i thought beating him would fix him but it looks like hes stuck like this."

while they were fiting the wolfpack managed to escape. verlis got on his arcanine and rode off to meet up with red and lillie so he could telled them about everything that happened.

verlis found them then telled them everything.

"thats not posibel" red sayed. "brendan finaly became a true fan and stopped being shit at pokemon. i refuse to believe that even jewnichi can turn him into a fake fan and shit trainer again. i will come up with a plan to remind him of who he realy is."

"we need to watch out for jewnichi to" lillie sayed. "he can appear anywhre with those wormholes."

"he was fine with just letting his cucks fite us before" red sayed. "but he got despreate there and fited brendan himself. he must be running out of faggots to send after us. i guess giovani, smogon, wolfe and now brendan is all he has left. we r probably near rr castle too."

"i want 2 beat wolfe" sayed verlis. "while i was in that mine it took a lot of time 2 reflect. i was cocky before i let my past success go 2 my head. but now im ready to accept the original 151 as the only true pokemon. with my innovation combined with there greatness nothing can stop me."

"i want smogon" lillie sayed. "he is a fucking asshole who made me play a 300 turn stall game and i wanted to kill myself. im going 2 make him suffer for that lol."

"ok then i guess giovanni is mine" red sayed. "and we will all do whatever we can 2 help brendan escape from the soy brainwashing."


	17. Chapter 17

message to haters: LISSEN U FUCKING PUSSIES U BETTER STOP LEAVING FUCKING NEGATIVE REVIEW ON MY FIC! U KNOW UR JUST USING GUEST ACCOUNTS BECAUSE UR SCARED ILL SEE THE CRINGE SHIT FICS U POST ON UR REAL ACCOUNT AND CALL THEM OUT FOR THE TRASH THEY ARE!

 **chapter 17 cant beat it?**

red and his friends spented severel days innovating new pokemon sets to beat jewnichi's overpowered fakemons. meanwhile at rr castle the villains were receiving there new orders from jewnichi.

"i cant belive those no good goys escaped my dirt mine!" jewnichi ranted as he snapped his inhaler in half angryly. "thats it no more second chances for these schlumps! i need a way to get rid of them for good!"

"lord jewnichi if i may" smogon injected. "if u finaly give me back my powers i can get rid of them with the final battle clause. i know u hate giving. but u hate red and his band of faggots even more right?"

"very well" jewnichi agreed. "i will use my almighty yiddish magic and make u the lord of all rules in the pokemon world! ur powers will be greater than ever smogon! u wont just have control over the rules on pokemon showdown! now u control the rules for the entire world! use it to send red, lillie and verlis straight to hell! take giovani with u so that u can wipe them out faster. ill send wolfe to join u after he gets back. hes currently at the hospital replacing the iv drips with his piss and after that hes going to go throw pennies at homeless people from the window of his limo."

"excellent" smogon laffed as he stroked his neckbeard and went 2 address his people.

"now what?" sayed giovanni. "how r we going 2 beat red?"

"ill show u" smogone xplained. "to the smogmobile!"

smogon walked out to his moms car.

"to the smogcave!" he explaimed.

his mother drove him back home and he led giovanni down into his basement.

"wtf r we doing here lol?" giovanni laffed. "im not goin 2 join ur faggy dungens and virgins session or whatever"

"thats ok" smogon laffed. "this is the end 4 u anyway lol"

"what?!" giovani explaimed.

"i bringed u down hear so i can dispose of u. now that i have my powers back i dont have 2 work 4 rr anymore. i know jewnichi watches everything from his magic tv. but he probably doesnt want 2 watch my basement because he thinks it is full of semen soaked body pillows and hentai posters."

"oh u mean like those ones over there?" giovani answered.

"wait there not mine im holding them for a friend!" smogon lied.

"nice try but u dont have friends" giovanni laffed.

"fuck" smogon laffed. "anyway u will serve as a good test 4 my new powers. first ill ban u. then ill get my revenge on lillie. then ill ban even jewnichi himself and take over the entire pokemon franchise! imagine it! every 3 years a new generation and all the new mons r designed exclusively 2 stall!"

"oh my god ur so fucking gay" giovanini sayed. "ill beat u anyway. but under 1 condition. we only use 2 pokemon each when we battel."

"fine" sayed smogon. "but we r going 2 battle with my banlist and with the final battel clause on. the loser is banned from this dimension forever."

"good lol" giovanni sayed. "im sick of ur fucking BO ruining our rr meetings anyway. go persian!"

smogon sented out his chansey and made it set up stealth rocks. persian hit it with slash but it didnt even take off half of chanseys health.

"pathetic" smogon grinned. "use toxic chansey!"

"not so fast virgin!" giovanni laffed. "persian use taunt!"

"taunt?" smogon jeered. "that was banned years ago under the fun prevention clause! cant have moves in the game that force players to actually attack!"

"fuck!" giovanni cursed. "fine! persian use slash and get a crit!"

"not so fast!" smogon interupted. "crits r also banned for bypassing hard earned defense buffs gained by stalling."

"wait u cant ban crits" giovanni argued. "that is actualy improving the quality of the game. u dont want 2 do that do u?"

"oh yeah ur write lol" smogon agreed. "fine crits r unbanned."

the pokemon did there attacks. persian got poisoned while chansey got hit by a crit and was nearly dead.

"hahaha its over! giovanni laffed. "u r so dumb. maybe with 6 mons u would be able to stall. but thats why i said we have 2 fite with 2 mons. once i outspeed and kill chansey with another slash u will not b able 2 switch anymore and waste time 2 kil me with poison."

"dont underestimate my autism" smogon telled him. "i have spent more time playing stall than i have spent outside my house in my entire life. it doesnt matter how many mons we fite with! 6! 2! 1! i can stall with anything! chansey come back and clefable come out!"

"persian hit clefable with slash!" giovani ordered.

it did but the clefable was wearing a rocky helmet.

"clefable use softboiled!" smogon ordered.

it healed off all the damage slash did. giovanni quickly relised he would just die of poison and rocky helmet if he used physicla attacks anymore.

"persian come back! go nidoking! lets see you beat this soygon! u cant poison it and it doesnt have to use physical attacks."

"oh i am so glad u did that" smogon laffed. "now i get to beat u with the longest, most boring type of stall there is! pp stall!"

giovannis eyes widened with horror as smogon sent clefable back and bringed out chansey. chansey used softboiled to heal off the earlier damage from the slash and didnt take enough damage from nidokings special attacks. whenever giovanni switched persian in, smogon would switch in clefable, and when he swiched nidoking in, smogon would switch in chansey. after 131 turns of pp stall giovanni was down to just nidoking and about to die from struggle damage.

"smogon u better surrender or i will have nidoking trash ur basement!" giovani threatend. "nidoking use struggle on smogons hentai collectoon!"

"fuck not that!" smogon cryed.

"call this battle off and ill not destroy anymore" giovanni telled him.

"i can always buy more after i ban jewnichi and steal his jew gold!" smogon rebuted. "u r not getting out of this. last time i just put my banhammer on the default setting which is why everyone ended hear. this time im putting it on the shuffle setting so it will send everyone i ban to a random dimension and u will b lost forever. u desere it 4 destroying my furry loli bdsm collection!"

"mamma mia!" giovanni sayed as smogon hit him with the banhammer and sent him far away.

"now that i know it works lillie is next!" smogon cackled. "time to take a trip to r/incels and recruit even more smogdrones to cheer me on in my battel. one of the only perks of being in 2010 is my favorite subreddit is not gone yet."


	18. Chapter 18

LISSEN U FUCKIN HATERS! U DIDNT LISSEN 2 MY FRIENDLY WARNING SO NOW IM BRINGING OUT THE BIG GUNS! **STOPP THE FUCKING NEGATIVE REVIEWS IMMEDIATELY OR MY FRIEND DILLON (HES A HACKER) WILL TURN UR FUCKIN COMPUTERS INTO FRIED BRICKS!**

c **hapter 18 ban it!**

after defeating giovani smogon sent a msg 2 his followers through r/incels.

"atention smogdrones iit is i ur glorius leeder smogon! i have returned 2 my former glory and am going to usher in a new age of stalll! i will arrange our first meeting at a place im sure a lot of u r alredy at, bronycon 2010! be there or b square!"

the traffic was heavy leading up to bronycon with the cars of the smogdrones moms filling up the road. when they arived outside, smogon was sitting on a metalic purple chariot which was drawn by 40 smogdrones. the smogdrones were so fat and gay it taked 40 of them just to pull their leader. a large crowd gathered around smogon. the repulsive odor that came from the crowd drived away even bronys.

meanwhile red and verlisify were having a practice pokemon battel. both of them were down 2 there final mon. red had his charizard out while verlis had his arcanine.

"wow u hav gotten way betta sinse u stopped using the fakes" red complimented. "u might even beat me!"

"yeah lol" sayed verlis. "i cant belive i let those fakes cramp my style for so long! its smogons fault tbh. he put so many bans on my favorite mons from the original 151 that i had to resort to using fakes just 2 innovate! that nerd made me so depressed my girlfriend broke up with me."

"smogon was a faggot" red agreed. "but u cant let faggots like him affect ur life. u should have stayed loyal to the original 151 even after his bs and finded a way to beat him like me and lillie did."

"ur right" verlis sayed. "now lets finish this battel! go arcanine use close combat! then use the contrary i skill swapped onto u to increase ur defences!"

his arcanine was about to attack when suddenly something horribel happened. explamation marks popped up around the arcanine preventing it from attacking and a robot voice called out "warning! innovation detected! this set is banned by the innovation clause!"

"WTF?!" red and verlis both sayed.

"innovation clause? but that shit is long gone. smogon doesnt have his powers anymore!"

"guys!" lillie explaimed with a horified look on her face. "look at this!"

it was the post that smogon had left on r/incels! it explained that he not only had his power back but now his rules were not just limited to pokemon showdown. all battels in the pokemon world had to follow smogon rules!

"no!" verlis cryed covering his face in disgust. "he cant be back..."

"smogon has been working for jewnichi for a long time" red telled verlis. "jewnichi must have gived him back his powers."

"wtf..." verlis coughed. just seconds earlyer he was on top of the world but now he felt suffocated by smogons presence.

speaking of being suffocated by smogons presence... back at bronycon the bronys were suffocating as they covered there faces to avoid the horrible BO that the smogdrones were emitting.

"well well well what do we have hear!" smogon explaimed as he aproached a vendor who was selling horse dildos. "my admin has a colection just like this actuly. isnt that right admin trop?"

"no lol" sayed admin trop as he stepped forwards. "horse dildos r 4 kiddos with pleb taste like red harem

i only have quality dragon dildos"

"shut up u fuckin hater" the vendor sayed. "i bet my horse bf could kick your stupid scalefag bf's ass."

"reported" sayed trop as he sent out a druddigon that he referred 2 as 'daddy'

the vendor sent out a mudsdale and they started fiting. the vendor soon relised he couldnt keep up with the new smogon rules and was defeted easily by trop and his druddigon daddy.

"pathetic kiddos with single digit iqs should not try to play this game" trop laffed.

"but my mudsdale would have won if i was allowed to use high horsepower!" the brony groaned.

"well u know what they say?" smogon grinned. "if u cant beat it..."

"ban it!" chorused the smogon army.

"now go my drones and beat all these bronys" smogon telled his men. "tell them they have 2 join us if they lose and if they dont agree just threaten them with the final battel clause."

soon the smogdrones had taken over and converted all the bronys to there army. it was hard 2 tell who was an original smogdrone and who was an original brony since both were really fat and gay. they began making there way to alola.

"i can smell something coming" sayed red.

"yeah something really unhygienic" lilie added. "i think smogon must b coming to us. but im ready 2 kick his ass. even with his stupid clauses im goin 2 take him down."

while red and lillie were getting ready 4 the battel verlis was still devasted over losing all his innovated sets again.

although red and lillie smelled smogon coming he and his followers were actully still 15 miles away. they were curently raiding hau'li city and using there fake smogon rules to bully the ppl into doing what they sayed with trheats of been banned.

"hey look a malasada stand!" sayed 1 of the fatter neckbeards. "hey stand owner! i want u to take all ur malasadas and put them in a blender. then i want you to pour as much pure soy as possibel into the blender. then i want u to just inject it directly into my bloodstream! oh and throw a few big macs in there as well!"

another neckbeard found a poster of the masked royal and burned it bcos seeing a male body that weighed under 500lbs let alone a actule buff 1 intimidated him and made him insecure.

another neckbeard was fiting the police after they came to arrest him 4 breaking into the day care center and trying to add all the cleffas and togepis to his harem.

while this was all goin on trop the scalefag admin had found a yugioh tournament to join.

"this is goin 2 be goat" he laffed. "this is 4 years before all my dragon rulers got banned so i can use them to bully all these kiddos with their richard tier decks."

trop made it to the finals where he got put against ray rizzo who had quit vgc and joined yugioh after escaping jewnichis dirt mine. all the crowd + all the judges had fallen asleep from watching dragon ruler gameplay so only trop and ray were left.

"i summon strema dragon ruler of droplets!" sayed trop as he started fapping after seeing the cards artwork.

"STREMA?!" ray explaimed. "MORE LIKE SEMEN! RAYS TURN! TIME 2 DRAW!"

ray reached over to his deck. a giant shredder which was 10 times the size of all his cards was balanced on top of the deck. "HAHAHA! RAY DREW FAVORITE SPELL CARD! I PLAY THE SHREDDER! THIS ALLOWS ME TO PUT ALL UR FAGGOT RULER INTO IT AND TURN THEM INTO CONFETTI! HAHAHAHA!"

ray smacked trop over the head with the shredder then snatched his deck while he was on the ground and shredded all of them.

"RAY ENDS TURN! LOOKS LIKE IT UR TURN TROP! OR SHOULD I SAY FLOP?! HAHAHAHAHA! OH WAIT LOOKS LIKE FLOP HAS RUN OUT OF CARDS TO DRAW! RAY WINS! HAHAHAHAHA!"

since there was no judges to see what happened ray was declared the winner and was gived a trophy while trop ran home crying clutching his $3000 full secret rare confetti. ray then filled the trophy cup up to the top with steroids and downed them before getting into his limo and driving straight through the sleeping crowd to get out of the tournament.

the sound of all this chaos alerted red and his friends. they came to hau'li city and finded smogon in charge f everything.

"lillie i thinked id find u hear!" smogon says. "time 2 get my revenge at last! well maybe... i have a deal 4 u and red if u r interested."

"i dont make deals with neckbards" lillie sayed defiantly.

"no wait hear me out" smogon sayed. "jewnichi alredy gived me back my powers so i dont need 2 work for him anymore. i actuly want to betray him and be the main villain again. im sick of this secondary antagonist bullshit life. lets team up and beat jewnichi then we can fite. ill show u wear rr castle is."

"hmm" thinked red and lillie.

"with this army of neckbeards we can beat jewnichi moar easily especialy if smogon shows us wear the castle is. maybe we can even beat him before he makes the garbage games black and white 2 in this world."

"but helping a cuck like this feels wrong"

"yeah"

"ok" lillie decided. "i will make a deal with u smogon. take us to rr castle and we will fite jewnichi together. but all ur neckbeards have to take a shower first."

this got a chorus of gasps from the audience.

"AND u have 2 tell ur fans to stop using fake pokemon and only use the original 151" red added.

"u drive a hard bargain" smogon sayed. "especialy the shower part. but we will take ur deal."

the crowd of neckbeards were disgruntled by the idea of having to take a shower. but they relised that going to fite jewnichi with lillie would be the first time in their lives that a female that wasnt there mother ever willingly did anything with them so they excepted.

suddenly the crowds talking was silenced by a epic shout.

"no"

it was verlis standing triumfantly atop his arcanine.

"we r going 2 beat jewnichi" he sayed. "but not like this. a world ran by smogon and his gay rules is evan worse than 1 ran by jewtendo and its horibel business practices. u showed me that i was wrong 4 using fake pokemon red. now im goin 2 show u that ur wrong 4 agreeing to play by smogons rules. lets battel smogon!"

"haha u realy want 2 fite me with all my clauses 2 back me up?" smogon laffed. "u couldnt even beat wolfe when he played by actual rules! im going 2 enjoy breaking u almost as much as i enjoyed making ur girlfriend break up with u!"

"ok thats it ur fuckin dead kiddo" verlis sayed as he grabbed his first pokeball."

smogon then went to grab his pokeball as well but his hand was covered in grease so he dropped it the first time. "lets battel furlisigay!"


End file.
